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May 2000

 


by (Livin' La Vida) Mocha


“purrrrrrrrrrrrrrr”

English Translation:

Why can’t a man be more like a cat?

Cats don’t leave the toliet seat up.
Cats don’t have to be called twice for dinner.
Cats like to snuggle.
Cats understand your moods.
Cats can’t borrow money from you.
When a cat comes in at 2:00 am, he doesn’t wake you up by crashing into the furniture.
Cats aren’t embarrased by the Tampox box in your bathroom.
A cat’s hailine will never recede.
Cats don’t care how long its been since you last shaved your legs.
Cats don’t need as much stroking
Cats are patient.
Cats don’t use the remote control to watch 34 shows at once.
Cats don’t whine about being neutered.
Cats never claim they know how to fix large appliances.
Chubby cats are cute.
Cats don’t use your hairbrush.
Cats don’t leave their toenail clippings on the floor.
Cats don’t misplace things and then blame it on you.
Cats don’t snore.
Cats are good listeners.
Cats don’t leave hair on the soap.
Cats don’t need to suck in their stomachs when they walk by a mirror.
Cats don’t complain when the Mastercard bill comes.
Cats don’t always have an ulterior motive when they rub up against you.
Cats don’t run up enormous bills in hardware stores.
Cats don’t think you need to get more exercise.
Cats enjoy a little foreplay before they pounce on their prey.
The hair sticking out of the cat’s ears is cute.
Cats don’t bring up the names of their former girlfriends.
Cats don’t get mad if you eat the last of the ice cream.
Cats aren’t car crazy.
Cats don’t brag about their endurance.
Cats never make fun of what you say.
Cats don’t care if your bra unhooks from the back or the front.
Cats don’t accidentally lock themselves out of the house.
Cats don’t always need to be right.
Cats don’t undress you with their eyes.
Cats don’t get beer bellies.
Cats don’t rush you when you are putting on your makeup.
Cats wash themselves everyday.
Cats let sleeping dogs lie.
Cats are affectionate.
Cats keep all your secrets.
Cats don’t lie to you.
One good purr is worth a thousand words.